How to Start When You Don't Know How

Hey friend!

Happy New Year! Is it too late to be saying that? Welcome to my first newsletter of 2024.

I'll be honest; despite the promise of a brand-new year filled with possibilities, I feel stuck. I'm so far in my head I'm blocked. And I recognize it for what it is: fear.

It's not uncommon for excitement to manifest as fear, especially when there's uncertainty about what lies ahead. Case in point: I have big plans for my personal and professional life this year. And, of course, our friend, the Chorus of Fear, doesn't want to sit on the sidelines.

I know I'm not the only one feeling this way. If your excitement is causing you to shrink instead of opening up to possibility, know I see you.

I want to offer some guidance from my book, a lesson on taking action when you don't know where to start.

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How To Take Action When You Don’t Know How Or Where To Start

Most people overthink starting. They make it way too complicated. Don’t be like most people. When starting, the path of least resistance is to start with what you have and where you are. The problem is that everyone thinks they must know how to complete step ten when they haven’t even started step one.

For instance, what would step one be if you wanted to change careers? I couldn’t give you an answer without asking for more information, but I can tell you what step one is not. Step one is not obsessing over job listings and becoming frustrated that you don't meet all the qualifications for the position you want to enter. It’s also not submitting your resignation letter (not yet, at least). Step one could be researching ways to fill the gaps in your qualifications. Maybe there’s a certification program that you could enroll in. It could be scheduling time with your director at work or a career coach to discuss your possible career path. You could even make a cost-benefit sheet on your current role and what you seek in a future role.

Want to learn how to swim, but you've never set foot in a body of water? Step one is not registering for a triathlon three weeks from now and then panicking that you won’t be able to finish it. Step one might be going to Target to purchase a swimsuit and goggles. But it’s probably more like joining your local recreation center and signing up for swimming lessons.

Step one is a tiny action. Something that helps get you going but doesn’t take up much time or require much energy. It's enough of an action that you can walk away satisfied with a quick win tucked into your back pocket while also shining a light on the path to step two.

Going back to my swimming example, if you registered for a triathlon three weeks from now as your step one, what would be your step two? I would guess you’d be completing that triathlon, but you would have skipped over so many steps. When would you learn to swim? When would you train? You create a situation for yourself where it’s highly likely that you will fail. While I think failure can offer us some good insights, that's the opposite of what I want for you.

I can give you steps, but this is where the steps end. There isn’t a five-step process for taking action when you don’t know how or where to start. It really is just assessing where you are and your resources. Then, find your step one and take that first step forward. Clarity, progress, and all that other good stuff come from doing the work. No linear process or list of hacks will get you there. You have to do the work. The more that you step forward, the more information you get. When you take action, you open up possibilities. There are paths that are now open and available to you that were not prior to you getting started.

I realize that taking action when you feel uncertain can be challenging because you want to get it right. So, I wanted to offer a few more pieces of advice that you might find useful:

Give yourself permission to take imperfect action. As writers, we use a concept called an SFD or “shitty first draft” to help us make progress. The idea is to get the words out and on paper (even if they’re terrible). To successfully complete your SFD, you have to give yourself permission to write imperfectly. To put down words that aren’t quite right. The same idea applies to taking action. You can still reach your destination even if your execution wasn’t as precise as Simone Biles competing in floor exercise. So, just give yourself permission to mess it up because it will be messy.

Zoom in on your next step. The thing that really gets in the way of your ability to take action today is worrying about tomorrow. All the “what-if” questions about situations that haven't come to pass yet. Stop borrowing trouble from the future and focus on the task at hand. Zoom in on your next step. You need to be so dialed in that everything else is out of focus.

Keep taking action as long as it isn’t to your detriment. Remember that we are wired to seek safety and comfort, so taking action is not our default setting. Ironically, every dream, goal, and result achieved comes from the action. It might be uncomfortable and painful, but keep taking action as long as it isn’t causing irreversible damage. Discomfort is a side effect of taking action. You will feel it if you’re doing it right. Growth and comfort can't inhabit the same space.

To sum it all up, what you are looking for really is on the other side of the act of doing. You have to commit to taking action even if it’s not pretty.

✨ One Tiny Action To Try This Week

Getting started often is the hardest part. Without a clearly defined path, it can be difficult to know where to start. The simplest way to start is to find your step one and let the path unfold. This week, ask yourself, what is the best and next logical step forward that you can take?

🌟 Links & Highlights 🌟

✨ My friend Lauren is offering her Journal Through It course for free. Use the code LOVE to get it.

✨ If you are a woman-owned product-based business, I encourage you to apply for the London Creates Things Ultimate Product Party Scholarship.

✨ I'm a YNAB (You Need A Budget) super stan. It changed my life just by helping me create a budget I could stick to. I am sharing this Learn YNAB in the 1-Hour class I taught from my creative archive.

⚡️ One More Thing ⚡️

Don't Let Fear Have All The Fun: and other advice for making bold moves even if you're afraid is one year old today! 🥳 This first year of being an author has been a masterclass in learning to market my book (I'm still figuring it out) and managing expectations. It has been fun, though.

I'm selling paperback copies in my online shop for $11 to celebrate. Use the code bookish at checkout.

Dream big and act boldly,

Monique